The wide sweeping bramble of the internet can be daunting. Say, for example, you are looking for a recipe to make a tasty chicken pot pie. Due to the huge amount of information available online, finding a chicken pot pie recipe on the internet is like finding a needle in a haystack. Or to use a more accurate simile, like finding a recipe on the internet.
Search engines are the sherpas of internet mountain. There are several search engines online. Google is one of the biggest and most popular, and a personal recommendation. Since its search page is exceptionally simple, it is the easiest and quickest to use. Yahoo, on the other hand, hits you with as much information as it can cram onto one page- everything from headlines to your local weather. If you’re after something specific, use Google. If you want to keep your finger right on the pulse of the world around you, use Yahoo.
Search engines are very easy to use. Simply type what you’re looking for into the box and hit “search.” So why dedicate a POGWI to it? Experience has shown that sometimes assuming a user understands something leads to disaster when they really don’t know what you’re talking about. Furthermore, there is a more complex side to search engines that many people don’t know about- operators.
Unfortunately, operators are not women who sit on the other side of the internet plugging different wires into different holes all day to help connect you to websites. Operators are terms that help tell the search engine what you’re looking for.
And- And is the simplest operator of them all. It is so simple that it doesn’t need to be used because search engines include it automatically. In the recipe example, searching for “chicken pot pie” (minus the quotes) actually runs a search for chicken AND pot AND pie. The search engine then pulls up pages that have all three words on them.
Quotation marks- Typing something into a search engine with quotes around it searches for that specific term. So “chicken pot pie” (minus quotes) might pull up a page that says “Becky trapped a live chicken in a pot! We let it go and all had pie” on it someplace. “Chicken pot pie” (with quotes) would only pull up pages with the three words in a row.
Or- Or is an operator when you want to pull up pages that have at least one of a few words. Searching for “chicken OR pot OR pie” (minus quotes) could pull up pages pertaining to handling livestock, marijuana, and fruit pies of the Pennsylvania Dutch. A truly useful search.
Not- Not will exclude pages from your search if they have a specified keyword on them. If you wanted to find only homemade pot pies and not frozen kinds, you might search for “chicken pot pies NOT microwavable” (again, minus the quotes.) You can combine operators and search for “”chicken pot pies” NOT microwavable” to prevent that weird story about Becky from showing up again.
Since it’s been in the news lately, today we are going to tackle a bit of Craigslist. Mostly the murder-intensive parts.
Craigslist is, in essence, the classified ads of the internet. Need to sell an old sofa? Craigslist. Need to hire some help for the stock room of your hardware store? Craigslist. How about a new roommate or a date for this Saturday? Craigslist. It’s a very valuable resource. I’ve found a bit of freelance work through CL myself. The problem is that it’s a classified section which has been given the nigh-infinite power of the internet, and power corrupts. Also people are straight up stupid.
CL has been getting a lot of media attention lately because of this “Craigslist Murderer.” This guy (allegedly?) met a few girls on Craigslist and then brutally murdered them. “Oh no,” you cry, “I don’t want to get murdered by my new hardware store stock boy!” Well you quiet your little mind, friend, because the Craigslist Murderer is a serial killer less along the lines of the Zodiac killer and more along the lines of Jack the Ripper.
You see, there are whole sections of Craigslist that are set up to help people put themselves in situations that could be viewed as a bit on the shady side, morally speaking. In addition to sections for finding workers for food service or retail, there is also a section to hire porn actors and models. They also have a whole personal section where “women looking for men” has become “women looking for men and looking for transgender teens.” There’s nothing wrong with that, it just gives you a taste of where we’re going.
The Craigslist Murderer didn’t arrange to have a pleasant dinner and maybe go catch a romantic comedy at the Cineplex; he arranged to pay for sexual services. See, sometimes a girl, or a guy, or a guy posing as a girl, will post an ad. This ad could be for a (wink wink) massage or perhaps it will look like a classified for a date. The date ones end one of two ways. They say they are looking for a man who is “generous” (or “generou$” if they think you won’t understand) or they will say they want someone who can give them an oddly specific amount of some innocuous thing. (150 smiles or 200 roses or something) They do not mean real flowers or a Judd Apatow movie they really just mean money.
So, is it safe to hire people from Craigslist? Sure. If you’re hiring for a business it’s a great way to find potential applicants. If you’re hiring for odd-jobs around the house you’ll probably be okay, probably. If you’re looking for someone to come over and pay for sex, well, be warned you might get your face stabbed off.
The internet is a big and varied place. It’s like a city. You can do pretty much anything you’d do in a real city. You can go to the movies, listen to music, talk to people, even set up a little home of your own. The primary difference is that your average city isn’t 96% red light district. Today we are going to discuss a basic part of the city: the postal system.
E-mail is the most basic form of communication online. Odds are your internet provider will also provide you with an e-mail address. If not, you can always get one for free at a site like HotMail or GMail. Your e-mail address is your mailbox in the city of the internet. Instead of “136 Main Street,” however, you’ll have something like “catlover@aol.com.”
Your e-mail address is constructed as follows: the “something.com” part is where your e-mail address is located. In the above example, the e-mail address is provided by AOL. The part before the “@” is your specific name. In the above example, “catlover.”
Be careful when selecting an address. You are going to be fairly stuck with it, so make sure it’s a good one. If you’ll be using it for anything even approaching professional, avoid addresses based on likes or interests. It’s okay for your kids to e-mail you at “sockpuppetfan@hotmail.com” (though a little embarrassing for them) but it’s less okay to write down on a job or credit card application.
Once you have an e-mail address you’re ready to go! Now there are just a few perils and pitfalls to avoid.
1.Watch out for junk mail. It’s just like the junk mail that shows up at your house, but it’s a bit more clever and a bit more vicious. Don’t open attachments from people you don’t know. (Attachments are like little packages that arrive in the mail, as opposed to letters.) No one on the internet wants to give you free money or enhance your genitals. Never trust anyone from Nigeria.
2.Be careful using your e-mail address to sign up for websites. Less reputable sites will sell your address to people who want to send you junk mail. (See point one)
3.Show discretion when sending along chain e-mails. The ones about wishes coming true and ghosts coming to get you if you do or don’t forward them are ridiculous drivel made up by cruel-minded people who have nothing better to do. (Me, for an example.) Sneakier still are the ones with humorous lists, cute photos of cats, or crude animated pictures. They aren’t bad for anything in a technical sense, but if you become a chronic forwarder of these missives you’ll be seen as a nuisance. Many people groan either inwardly or out loud when they see an e-mail titled “Fwd: Forward: FWD: Re: FwD: Look at this puppy!”
Keep these things in mind when you’re at the keyboard and you should be safe and sound.
Congratulations! You now have a basic working knowledge of e-mail!he above example, catlover.”ove example, the e-mail address is provided by AOL. The part before the
Attention moms and dads and grandparents! I know it’s hard for you. You want to talk to your kids but it’s all “Facebook this” and “Twitter that” and “e-mail such-and-stuff.” What the hell can you do?! I understand your plight. I’m terrified of the day that technology is some sort of impenetrable riddle for me. And here you are living it!
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